Children’s abuse – how to avoid it!

How to Protect Our Children from the H1N1 Virus (Swine Flu)

2009-11-11T06:02:00.000-08:00

As parents, we are concerned with the safety of our children. It's that time of year when our children are returning to school. With the return of school, comes the concern of germs and viruses children become exposed to. Heavy on our minds is the threat of the H1N1 Virus, otherwise known as the Swine Flu. Note the following steps that should be given special attention in order to protect our children from this potentially deadly virus.

Instructions

1
Avoid contact with anyone that has a cough.

2
If possible, avoid large crowds.

3
If your child is sick, keep them at home.

4
Remind your child to cover his or her mouth when coughing or sneezing.

5
Encourage your child to thoroughly wash his or her hands with soap and warm water. Use antibacterial hand gels when it is not possible to wash with soap and water.

6
Stay informed. Avoid places where the flu is known to exist.
Step
7

If your child shows symptoms of the flu (sore throat, chills, muscle aches or fever), keep him or her hydrated. Regular doses of ibuprofen or acetaminophen should be administered.

8
If the flu symptoms worsen seek medical attention. The doctor might feel an antiviral medication is in order.

9
Remember to launder towels and linens. Also, wipe surfaces with disinfectants regularly.

Have some comments? So... WELCOME!!!

Top 10 children's problems

2009-10-20T04:49:00.000-07:00

Top 10 children's problems:

1. Childhood obesity;
2. Drug abuse;
3. Smoking/tobacco use;
4. Bullying;
5. Internet safety;
6. Child abuse and neglect;
7. Alcohol abuse;
8. Stress;
9. Not enough opportunities for physical activity;
10. Teen pregnancy.

Experts consider that these problems are the most dangerous children’s problems. I would like to know your opinion on this matter… Have you ever been faced even with one of these problems and how you found a solution? Do not be indifferent; your indifference can kill hundreds of innocent children.

Children in conflict with the law

2009-10-08T03:31:00.000-07:00

The term 'children in conflict with the law' refers to anyone under 18 who comes into contact with the justice system as a result of being suspected or accused of committing an offence. Most children in conflict with the law have committed petty crimes or such minor offences as vagrancy, truancy, begging or alcohol use. Some of these are known as 'status offences' and are not considered criminal when committed by adults.

People I wanna you to read these facts & put on considering cap how you can help deprived children near you!

There are more that 1 million children worldwide are living in detention as a result of being in conflict with the law. The majority of children who end up in the criminal justice system are from particularly deprived communities and families, often from discriminated minorities.

Putting children in prison instead of seeking alternatives stigmatizes them as delinquents, robs them of opportunities for jobs and scholarships and exposes them to others who have committed more serious crimes. It also increases the likelihood of children breaking the law once again.

Are there alternatives to detention? Yes! Don't imprison children simply trying to survive; divert children who have committed minor crimes away from the criminal justice system; use detention only as a last resort; when children are imprisoned they should be kept separate from adults; governments should monitor the situation very closely, at a minimum having records of how many children are in jail and how long they have been there.

Protecting children against sexual abuse!

2009-09-29T01:10:00.000-07:00

This article was updated by the New York State Office of Children & Family Services. I hope it will be very useful for you & will help you to protect yours children.

Good communication between the parent and child is the most important step in protecting a child against sexual abuse. While talking with children about anything is sometimes challenging for parents, talking about child sexual abuse can be even more difficult. This booklet is for parents who want a little help in finding the right way to talk about sexual abuse with their children.
Getting Ready You might feel uncomfortable because you may not know how to begin, or because you feel you do not have the answers to all the questions your child may ask. You may worry that you could destroy your child’s ability to trust adults and share affection, or leave the child thinking that sex is “bad” or “dirty.” You may be afraid of confusing or frightening the child by saying the wrong thing. If you present the information as being a lesson in personal safety (as when you told your child not to touch a hot stove or to walk facing traffic), you will realize that the subject can be handled in a straightforward, matter-of-fact way.
1How to Start! You can start by teaching your child that his or her body is special and should be protected. Begin as soon as you think your child is old enough to understand, usually at about age three. Start simple and keep it that way. While you should try to use the correct names for body parts, this is not a requirement. Using the correct names will help the child develop a healthy respect for his or her body. But, if you have trouble doing this, use other names. Just start talking! Do not try to cover everything in one discussion. Talking to your child about sexual abuse and personal safety should be an on-going process. And, do not make a big thing of these talks. Be casual and informal, and choose a time when the child feels safe and relaxed. For example, talk to the child: ◆ while the child is playing; ◆ during a leisurely walk, or while riding in the car or on a bus; ◆ while fixing a meal together; ◆ while watching TV, or when discussing events in the newspaper; ◆ in connection with a remark made by the child; or ◆ while tucking the child into bed at night. 2. What To Discuss When you talk is not as important as what is said. Here are the main ideas you should convey: ◆ You are special and important. ◆ Your body is your own. ◆ You have the right to say “NO” if someone wants to touch you in any way that makes you feel uncomfortable, afraid or confused. ◆ There are parts of your body that are private. You have the right to say “NO” to anyone who wants to touch your vagina, penis, breasts or buttocks. You have my permission to say “NO” even if that person is an adult … even if it’s a grown-up you know. ◆ Pay attention to your feelings. Trust your feelings about the way people touch you. ◆ If someone bothers you, I want you to tell me. I promise that I will believe you. ◆ If someone touches you in a way that does not seem right, it is not your fault. Children need to know that the safety rules about touching apply all the time, not just with strangers … or with men … or with baby sitters. In many cases reported in New York State and nationwide, children are sexually abused by people they know and trust — relatives (even parents or siblings), friends of the family, and authority figures (teachers, youth group leaders, clergy, etc.). Sexual abuse usually occurs in places where children feel comfortable or safe — at home or in the home of a family friend.
3. Also, abusers seldom need to use physical force to get a child to participate in sexual activities. Rather, they take advantage of the child’s trust or friendship and use threats to keep the activity a secret. For example, a child may be told that his or her parents “will not believe a kid.” Other commonly used threats are: “If you tell I will hurt you”; “I will hurt your mother”; “I will have to go to jail”; or “The family will break up.” Unfortunately, abusers can use threats successfully because children are taught to believe and obey adults.
4. Other Rules to Follow: Children learn best when given simple rules to follow. ◆ Establish a set of family rules about personal safety and repeat them often. ◆ Include touching rules when you talk about other types of safety. ◆ Teach children that adults may not always be right. ◆ Remember that there are differences between what younger children and older children can understand. ◆ Play the “What If” game.
5. The “What If” Game One way to help children protect themselves is to practice responses to potentially dangerous situations. That way, if necessary, the children can react properly and quickly. The “What If” game can make practicing easy and fun. Every time you play, say this to your child, in your own words: “Your body belongs to you and you have a right to decide how and when anyone can touch you. If somebody tries to touch you in a way that doesn’t feel good, or doesn’t seem right, say ‘NO!’ It’s even OK to shout and yell ‘NO!’ Then run away and tell somebody. If the first person doesn’t believe you, keep telling people until someone does. Always remember, it’s not your fault!”
Here are some “What Ifs” to start you off: 1. What If… something was bothering you and you did not know what to do about it? Who might be able to help you? Answer… People you trust, such as a parent, another relative, neighbor, teacher, school nurse, police officer, clergy. 2. What If… someone touched you in a way you did not like and offered you a candy bar, a brand new doll or something else you really wanted to keep a secret? Answer… Say “NO!” and tell someone. 3. What If… a stranger offered you a ride in a shiny new car? Answer… Never accept rides from a stranger. 4. What If… you did not want to be hugged by a particular adult? Answer… Say “NO!” to that adult. You may like the person, but you may not want to be hugged at that time. 5. What If… you got a “bad feeling” or felt “yucky” when a grown-up gave you a hug or a big squeeze? Answer… Tell the person you do not like it. You have the right to decide when you want to be hugged or touched. Trust your feelings about the way people touch you. 6. What If… someone you do not know comes to take you home from school? Answer… Never go with a stranger unless the stranger gives you our special code word. (Select a simple code word and teach it to your child. Make sure the child understands the importance of the word.) 7. What If… someone is tickling you and it starts to hurt? Answer… Tell them to stop. If they will not stop, call for help. If I am not home at the time, tell me about it later. 8. What If… Mommy, daddy or a doctor touched the private parts of your body? Answer… There are times when others may need to touch your private parts. For example, mommy or daddy may touch your private parts when they are bathing you; or a doctor may need to touch you during an examination. But, if the touching hurts or bothers you, tell them. Alternate… Grown-ups do not usually need to touch children in private areas unless it is for health reasons. 9. What If… the baby sitter wanted to touch you under your night clothes? Answer… No one has the right to put their hand under your clothes; force you to touch them; touch your body; or touch your private body parts. 10. What If… your uncle (aunt) wanted you to sit on his (her) lap and you did not want to? Answer… You can say “NO!” to your uncle/aunt if, for some reason, you do not want to do it. You can make up many more “What Ifs” from your child’s own everyday experiences, using familiar names and places. Discuss only one or two per talk. But, be sure to practice regularly so that your child learns to recognize when to say “NO!” and when help is needed. This will increase your child’s ability to act quickly and calmly. Emphasize that the child always has a right to say “NO!” And remember, children are safer if they know what to do when they feel threatened. Just In Case You cannot prepare children for every single type of situation that can occur. Parents must be on guard and observant at all times. Here are some signs that may indicate a child is being sexually abused: ◆ unusual sexual knowledge or behavior(s); ◆ any changes in behavior, such as loss of appetite, night-mares, inability to sleep, or withdrawal from usual activities; ◆ poor relationships with friends; ◆ return to bedwetting or thumb sucking; ◆ genital disease, genital irritation or bleeding, swelling, pain, itching, cuts or bruises in genital, vaginal or anal areas; ◆ difficulty concentrating at school; ◆ fear of a person, or an intense dislike of being left somewhere or with someone; ◆ pregnancy; ◆ aggressive or disruptive behavior, delinquency, running away or prostitution; ◆ self-destructive behavior(s). If your child tells you that he or she was touched inappropriately by an adult or that an adult has committed any of the acts listed under the “Definition” (see inside back cover) of child sexual abuse, there are certain things you must do: ◆ Listen and believe your child. Do not deny the problem or blame your child. ◆ Stay calm! If you get upset or angry, you will frighten the child. Try to talk quietly with the child. ◆ Tell the child that he or she did nothing wrong. Sexual abuse is the fault of the abuser. ◆ Tell the child that he or she is safe and will not be harmed. ◆ Tell your child that he or she did the right thing by telling you. ◆ Do not confront the alleged perpetrator. ◆ Call the authorities.

Children should be disciplined, but not abused

2009-09-22T01:46:00.000-07:00

Just about everyone would agree that children should not be abused. And most adults would agree that children need discipline. Beyond these basic ideas, however, opinions and parenting styles differ. How strict should parents and caregivers be & what kind of discipline works best?
Discipline is not the same as punishment. Instead, discipline has to do more with teaching, and involves teaching your child right from wrong, how to respect the rights of others, which behaviors are acceptable and which are not, with a goal of helping to develop a child who feels secure and loved, is self-confident, self-disciplined and knows how to control his impulses, and who does not get overly frustrated with the normal stresses of everyday life.
Children are not born knowing how to be well behaved. They need help and guidance from parents and other careers - and as all parents know this isn't always an easy job.
Children always learn is by imitating & copying others. This is why parents need to behave in ways which set good examples. It's important that we, as parents, show respect for children - Naturally, children who are shown respect themselves will show respect to others. Although children need to know they are unique individuals, they also need to know they are part of a group too. This is why we need to teach them to share, to listen to others and to take turns.
Important Reminders about Discipline:
• Stay calm and do not get carried away when your child misbehaves. Avoid yelling and screaming, since this can teach your child that it is all right to lose control if you don't get your way. If you feel like things are escalating too much, then take a break until you can regain your composure.
• Avoid too much criticism. Make sure your child understands that it is the misbehavior that you are unhappy with and that you will always love him.
• Avoid too much praise. You don't need to be continuously praising your child, especially for routine activities, because it will make your comments less effective.
• Don't focus on negatives all of the time, especially when offering positive reinforcement. It is much better to say ‘I like that you put all of your clothes away,' instead of saying ‘I like that, for once, you finally got around to putting your clothes away without my asking.'
• Avoid physical punishment. Spanking has never been shown to be more effective than other forms of punishment and will make your child more aggressive and angry.
• Remember to give rewards and praise for good behavior.
• Understand the difference between rewards and bribes. A reward is something your child receives after he has done something, while a bribe is given beforehand, to try and motivate your child to do what you want. Bribes should be avoided.
• Be a good role model.
• Most importantly, provide your child with a safe environment in which he feels secure and loved.
Many parents use physical discipline.
This approach has some problems:
• May work at first because it shocks a child. But it becomes less effective as it is repeated or if it comes with anger and rejection.
• Teaches a child that sometimes it's okay to hurt a person.
• Can cause anger that a child carries with him even as an adult. A child who has received physical punishment again and again is more likely to physically punish his own children or to hit a partner.
• Can easily become abusive. Anger and frustration can cause parents and caregivers to lose control. In one survey, 85 percent of parents said they felt anger, remorse, and turmoil while punishing their children.
Discipline also goes wrong when it involves emotional abuse. Emotional abuse can affect children in many ways. They may become insecure, destructive, angry, or withdrawn. They may even become suicidal. They may not develop basic skills, may have trouble in relationships, and may abuse alcohol or drugs.
What To Do
When punishment is necessary:
• Avoid hitting, yelling, and lecturing
• Enforce rules consistently
• Use timeouts with young children
• Explain punishments and desired behaviors as children get older
Listen, guide, and set limits that are reasonable and fair for older children and teens.

WHAT YOUR CHILD CAN DO TO BE PROTECTED:

2009-09-15T05:12:00.000-07:00

WHAT YOUR CHILD CAN DO:

The rules for younger children

1) I KNOW my name, address, telephone number, and my parents' names.

2) I always CHECK FIRST with my parents or the person in charge. I tell them before

3) I go anywhere or get into a car, even with someone I know.

4) I always CHECK FIRST with my parents or a trusted adult before I accept anything from anyone, even from someone I know.

5) I always TAKE A FRIEND with me when I go places or play outside.

6) I SAY NO if someone tries to touch me or treat me in a way that makes me feel scared, uncomfortable, or confused.

7) It's OK to SAY NO, and I KNOW that there will always be someone who can help me.

8) I KNOW that I can TELL my parents or a trusted adult if I feel scared, uncomfortable, or confused.

9) I am STRONG, SMART, and have the right to be SAFE.

Children’s abuse – how to avoid it!

2009-09-10T00:42:00.000-07:00

The subject of children’s abuse is not a pleasant thing for parents to think or talk about. They all say "it could never happen to me"; and they don't even want to talk about it. But for the benefit of our children, it is absolutely necessary to openly discuss this subject seeking some form of solution to the problem and be ready to handle it when it occurs to your child.

Child abuse can take four forms, all of which can cause long term damage to a child: physical abuse, emotional abuse, neglect and child sexual abuse. Bullying and domestic violence are also forms of child abuse.

A child may be experiencing abuse if he or she is:

· frequently dirty, hungry or inadequately dressed

· left in unsafe situations or without medical attention

· constantly "put down", insulted, sworn at or humiliated

· seems afraid of parents or careers

· severely bruised or injured

· displays sexual behavior which doesn't seem appropriate for their age

· growing up in a home where there is domestic violence

· living with parents or careers involved in serious drug or alcohol abuse.

All children have episodes of bad behavior, some more frequently and severely and others less. Using the next rules will help you to improve your child's behavior and to reduce the frequency and severity of any child behavior problem.

1) Show your love by taking time to listen, to play, and to teach. Of course, it’s absolutely impossible for you to watch or be with your children 24 hours a day, but they always should fell your support.

2) Be informed & attentive to your child's attitude, moods, and behavior; and then, respond to both good and bad behavior quickly. Talk to your child's teachers and counselors about his problems. Join a parenting support group or find a counselor for you to learn coping skills.

3) Planning is the secret of good parenting. It involves knowing your child, her temperament and skills, and knowing the challenges of her environment. Familiarize yourself with the symptoms of childhood emotional and behavioral disorders and treatment options. Use direct instruction, guidance, and practice opportunities to teach the skills she will need to cope with new challenges in the journey of childhood.

4) Don't Use Violence. Aggressive behavior increases in children after they witness violence at home, school, or in the media. Don’t allow your child to view violent programming or play violent games. Maybe it’s hurt today but if you start now it will be easier in future.

5) And the last rule, if there is something wrong with your child – never give up! Talk to him about his feelings and worries. Let him know that you love and support him. Convey your faith and confidence that he can cope successfully.